Only the beginning of November y’all, but it already feels a lot like Christmas. I insist on not having “All I Want For Christmas Is You” in full blast though. No shade, but I un-lowkey have a strong feeling about Mariah Carey (only second to Taylor Swift – that girl kills my ears, they need some love too but not from you, thank you very much). And guess what, first time ever I am narcissistic enough to use my face as the blog entry’s featured image.
Five days ago marked the date I had my hair cut to a pixie and dyed dark ashy blond. Back to just before that my hair was a lot of inches past my shoulders and had a fading ombre of dark purply-red and coppery red. I hated the length and I hated the color. I wanted to have it dyed so badly but they couldn’t tone it so I had to go home utterly disappointed and distressed. The idea of the pixie cut just came out of nowhere and something inside me just urged me to give it ago. After all, it’s just hair and it will always grow back. I’m not talking about brow hairs though, they’re a bitch that never proceeds to keep on giving. (Side note: really digging this color – it seems to shift in tone all the time from warm brond to dark brown thanks to the remnants of that purply-red streaks to slightly metallic (I know this sounds weird) honey blond to true ashy blond).
I was too naive to realize the hard work it inevitably comes with blond hair in a pixie cut when my natural hair is very straight and soft: it doesn’t feel coarse or damaged at all, but the styling is painful! Immediately after the cut I had to buy a shampoo especially formulated for dyed hair and a hair styling wax. There’s always some sort of wax involved to force the hair to cooperate into a layered texture and stay in style, instead of sticking straight up or straight down like a beret. Constant retouching and re-finessing is a must, hand in hand with a mirror and self-consciousness: is my hair ok? does it look flat? am I looking like Lloyd Christmas?
This hairstyle, however, leads to a much bigger problem aesthetic-wise: how to appear not like a total boy? Prior to the transformation most of my clothes are borrowed from the boys but my long hair saves the day. Now that there’s no savior, it takes much thinking and effort to assemble a good outfit for work or going out. For the past few days I’ve been sticking with simple dress, boyfriend jeans teamed up with sheer turtle neck top to somewhat keep a bit of femininity. Today’s outfit is a perk though: white V-neck t-shirt, white blazer with lace details, embroidered boyfriend jeans and silver shoes. There are definite pieces I need to bring to my wardrobe: a simple soft blazer, a pair of black boots and sleeveless tops. There must be something to give it a balance: embroidery, flowers, sheer or lacy textures and sometimes a little metallic. I can’t go all girly, but a little bit added here and there does no harm. And always wear lipstick!
Being able to refresh myself through physical transformation has a much stronger impact than I imagined: I feel more confident, more daring, and more creative. I feel so much like a new version of myself, like Augusta V2.0, and now I’m doing some overhaul for my appearance too. It forces me to be creative with my current clothes and to be savvy when buying new things so that they fit perfectly with my overall taste. Never too girly, never too boyish, always different. I got a few comments from passing strangers regarding my look for the past few days, and as I was minding my own business and enjoyment as sipping a smoothie and watching my favorite videos alone in a coffee shop. What’s wrong with being alone anyway, when I’m this baddie with ashy blond pixie hair in boyfriend jeans?