November has surely gone away much faster than I thought. In fact, the whole eleven months of 2016 have done the same thing: we started the year thinking there would be plenty of time ahead but boom! now it’s the first day of December. I feel like being played, seriously. Is this how I get old day by day without myself even realizing? Scared? Yes. Excited? Hell yes! Let’s do some recap, dennoch (we will come to that later), for the shake of documenting my overly eventful month in preparation for the very last month and who knows, maybe appreciate it and live slower a little bit.
I made a big decision relationship-wise and now I feel better and more independent than ever. I used to be the one who wrote on my diary’s first page: Life Goals – Stay Single. Yep, that was me, circa before my two relationships that altogether lasted 5 years. Augusta V.2011 was almost like V.2016, going full circle it seems. The differences are, though, that now I know what love means and its power, but it’s not necessary to be with it at all times. Now I’m calmer and more of a believer in destiny. I can smile whenever seeing happy couples while being alone, but certainly not lonely.
Took a trip to Thailand and Hanoi alone (well, in October, but that has a lot to do with what’s coming right next). That ignited my love for exploring places and not being in my own shell, comfortable but restraining.
Mastered going out alone and enjoying the heck outta it. I have come to love going to coffee shops alone, dipping my head (figuratively) in a cloud of warm coffee smell while tasting some cake frosting (well, in all honesty, I have to hold back on this habit or I will be bigger than yo mamas – I’m sorry for my ill-executed joke) and catching up with exciting videos and conversations. Before the revelation while traveling alone to Hanoi, I was so much against the idea of going out alone in fear that people would think I had to go alone since nobody liked me. But heck, that dependence! Why not just go when the heart desires rather than spend hours persuading someone to go with me for the sake of having a companion? That kills the excitement.
Became a regular to yoga classes. Tried to go to the gym twice, each lasted about 3 sessions until when I decided to try yoga back in September, then a whole month break until November when I went back to it. Yoga agrees with me it seems. I liked the relaxing yet intense those yoga poses bring, sweating in heaven knows positions but with maximal relaxed face and muscles do me great especially when it comes to a better night’s sleep and overall wellness.
Made new friends and reconnected with old ones. And by going to yoga class I’ve made a new friend who surprisingly comes from the area I used to live in back when I was a kid. We already have planned going to the movie and dining out sometime soon. It seems this friendship is here to stay. I enjoy talking to her while sweating my ass off in and after the class. I and the girls from university go to the movies almost weekly and it has recently become quite a ritual. It’s amazingly heart-warming to enjoy those simple laughters and moments, just us girls and nobody else.
Rekindled my love for drawing, reading, learning acoustic guitar and learning German (hence the “dennoch” thingy, ha!). About 2 weeks ago I think, I picked up the sketchbook my flat mate gifted me on my birthday and the whole bunch of pencils of years ago when I was still furiously passionate with drawing everyone I adored. I thought my skills were all gone but bit by bit seeing the drawing come together was magical and the moment all the finesses were done, a sense of proud overwhelmed my heart. I should never abandon this wonderful artistic outlet, ever again! German, ah! I used to be so smitten with it, and now I am again, such a lovely language. I’m now learning through Duolingo and enjoying every lesson. Honestly speaking though, I want to be that person who speaks 4 languages. Ich verlasse dich nicht, süß Deutsch, meine Leidenschaft du bist. And the other two things because why not?
All in all, November was a busy one, to say the least. My days were filled with works and excitements but not to be confused with trying to escape the demon inside. Admittedly, I used to try to be overwhelmed with works and chores so that I would not have time to think, and I still do, but now I feel like I know how to tame the beast even just minimally, but any effort counts, eh? It’s amazingly refreshing to revisit (that’s a bullshit phrase) old habits and hobbies after all those years (drawing 5 years and guitar about 6, maybe and the same for German) as well as pursuing new ones aka practicing yoga and enjoying me-times, not to mention seeing yourself evolving. Who’s excited for December and all the Christmassy festivities? I definitely am.